For this week’s NFL recap, I have once again decided to merge two things that I love very much; football and “The Office”. I believe that weaving in the incredible quotability of the NBC phenomenon with the highs and lows of NFL football will make for spectacular content. I take great joy in creating a world where Pam Beesly and Russell Wilson share a commonality, where Michael Scott has something to do with Patrick Mahomes. Oh, what a beautiful world that is.

“I’m going to die.” — Stanley Hudson 

Justin Fields and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad Chicago Bears offense

Historically, when teams have spent high draft picks on quarterbacks, they either a) already possessed a solid existing foundation for a young quarterback to succeed in, or b) invested lots of resources (draft picks, free agent money, etc.) to build a solid foundation for a young quarterback to succeed. 

There have been many recent examples of this, with one notably being how the Chargers have invested into Justin Herbert; they spent two first-round picks on offensive lineman (Rashawn Slater in 2021 and Zion Johnson in 2022), made Corey Linsley one of the highest paid center in the league, handed out a lucrative extension to Mike Williams and made Brandon Staley, a far better offensively-minded coach than Anthony Lynn, their head coach. Although their 2022 season has gone a tad sideways due to injuries, the Chargers have invested into a superstar quarterback that’s still under his rookie contract, which is smart considering that quarterbacks are the most important and expensive players on the field.    

The Bears have done the exact opposite with Justin Fields. Their lack of support around him has been known for a while now, but things really boiled over in Thursday night’s 12-7 defeat to the Commanders that looked a lot closer to a game from 1922 than 2022. 

On Thursday night, in front of a national audience, the world got to see the Bears offense in their final form. While numbers are prone to being liars, when regarding Fields’ pressure statistics, these numbers plead the Fifth. Fields was pressured 18 times, hit 12, sacked five and forced to scramble on 12 plays. While Fields absolutely made a few bad plays himself, Chicago’s offensive line and wide receivers didn’t do much to help him out, either. 

Even on Fields’ beautiful touchdown throw to Dante Pettis (which Amazon, who hadn’t experienced a touchdown on their broadcast in almost two weeks, missed), he got clobbered by his own left tackle as Josh Sweat collapsed the pocket in the blink of an eye. 

After the game, Fields looked exhausted. He had taken yet another beating and seemed sick and tired of it during the post game press conference:

On the season, Fields has been pressured on 46% of his dropbacks, per ESPN; that’s the most through six weeks since ESPN started tracking pressures in 2009. Rookie left tackle Braxton Jones has given up 20 pressures, which ranks second among all tackles according to Pro Football Focus. Left guard Lucas Patrick has given up 16 pressures, good for second-most among guards. Center Sam Mustipher has given up the most pressures at his position. How have things gotten this bad in Chicago?

While teams like the Chargers seemed to care at least a little bit about putting the most important player on their team in a situation to succeed, the Bears have neglected theirs, which is surprising considering that they traded up to get Fields in the 2021 draft. They did use a second-round pick on offensive tackle Teven Jenkins, who’s actually looked really good at right guard recently. However, he’s been the only bright spot on a treacherous Bears offensive line. 

It’s not like the Bears haven’t had opportunities to at least try and build around Fields. They had enough money to pay Riley Reiff over the offseason, but could’ve also gotten one of La’El Collins, Roger Saffold or Duane Brown for a similar price. In the 2022 draft, the Bears had two second round picks, which they used on a cornerback and a safety. While Kyler Gordon and Jaquan Brisker have played well thus far, the Bears could’ve taken Wan’Dale Robinson, George Pickens, Skyy Moore or Abraham Lucas, all of whom would’ve immediately helped the Bears offense. They used their third round pick on a wide receiver in Velus Jones Jr, but did most of his damage as a kick/punt returner in college and has struggled mightily to start the season. 

The counter-argument that Fields has been bad by himself does have merit. However, bad habits, a lack of trust and slow development is created from an unsupportive environment. Sure, Fields has made a number of seemingly poor reads and missed a number of receivers, but a good chunk of these mistakes are the result of Fields residing in a horrendous football ecosystem.

For example, Fields eluding the pocket early may look bad on the surface, but that’s likely because he’s anticipating the pocket collapsing quickly, which shouldn’t be happening. He also may scramble more often than one would like because no Chicago receivers can get open. Luke Getsy has tried to incorporate a lot more roll outs for Fields than last season, but he has still been confined to the pocket more often than not.  

Think of two of the same bird in two separate jungles. One bird’s jungle is always full of food, contains many places for a spacious habitat and is untouched by humans. The other bird’s jungle is constantly on fire, almost always lacks food and keeps getting flooded with invasive species. Which bird do you think has the best chance of surviving? Environmental science analogy aside, the Bears have done serious damage to Justin Fields’ career development. They need to figure something out soon, or else Fields could end up on a similar path as Andrew Luck quicker than one might think. 

“There’s something about an underdog that really inspires the unexceptional.” — Robert California

The 5-1 New York Football Giants, just as we all predicted  

For the second consecutive week, the Giants rolled into a matchup as the underdog, throwing out players you may have not heard of before against a top-tier quarterback and finding themselves down double-digits…and won. The Cinderellas of the first third of the NFL season improved to 5-1, their best start since 2008. 

Kayvon Thibodeaux, who sealed the victory with a strip sack of Lamar Jackson, seemed happy: 

In these first six games, Brian Daboll, Mike Kafka and Wink Martindale have tested the limits of just how much coaching can uplift a team. On paper, the Ravens, Packers and probably the Titans all have better rosters than the Giants, yet New York triumphed over all three of them. This has been a masterclass in maximizing talent. 

Last week, I detailed how the Giants offense has changed so much for the better. This week was another example of said improvement. Take this touchdown pass to Wan’Dale Robinson: 

On the surface, it looks like a very normal, well-executed football play. The Giants line up in a bunch set to the left side, David Sills V sets a beautiful pick on Damarion Williams, and Daniel Jones hits Robinson in the flat for an easy score. Again, all seemingly normal stuff, but that’s the point. The Giants haven’t had an effective offensive play caller in years, and by effective, I mean someone who actually puts their players in favorable positions to succeed, which should be the standard for an NFL coordinator. Normalcy has been absent from the Giants offense until this season. 

Defensively, Martindale called blitzes like he was Kylo Ren trying to kill Luke Skywalker in “The Last Jedi”, except Martindale actually succeeded (mostly). The former Ravens defensive coordinator blitzed on 69.4% of Lamar Jackson’s drop backs, a mind-boggling number that is even crazier when it’s one of the most elusive quarterbacks in the game you’re blitzing. While Jackson burned the Giants a few times, his two turnovers in the final three minutes of the game were because of persistent pressure, so mission accomplished. 

The Giants also did something that past Giants teams of the past couldn’t do for the life of them: they caught breaks. It often felt like the football gods were on the opponent’s side whenever the Giants played, whether it was a backbreaking turnover or a stupefying drop. On Sunday, it was the Ravens who couldn’t seem to catch a break. Saquon Barkley’s go-ahead touchdown was set up by a Julian Love interception off of an aborted snap. The Ravens committed 10 penalties, one of which wiped away a Marcus Peters interception in the end zone that might’ve sealed the game for Baltimore. Heck, Justin Tucker even missed a field goal. This stuff never happens to the Giants!

For the first time in what feels like forever, the Giants are watchable. They’re finding ways to win football games when the Giants of recent years would’ve found ways to lose. With the Jaguars, Seahawks, Texans and Lions making up New York’s next four opponents, the Giants could easily pick up their ninth win before December for only the third time since 1989. Even if they drop two of those games, they’d only need to win two of their last seven to get to nine victories, which should be enough for a playoff berth in a wonky NFC. Brian Daboll’s mayoral candidacy would be through the roof right now. 

“Stanley yelled at me today. That was one of the most frightening experiences of my life.” — Ryan Howard

Tom Brady and the Buccaneers offensive line

Out of the still-living football people I’d least like to be yelled at by, only Nick Saban might take the top spot over Tom Brady, who had a few choice words for his offensive line that was struggling against a seemingly rejuvenated Steelers front seven: 

Brady’s expletive-laden tirade certainly had some merit. The Steelers gave Tampa Bay’s offensive line fits all afternoon. With the Bucs at the Pittsburgh one-yard line, the Steelers forced a field goal after blowing up a run and sacking Tom Brady on back-to-back plays. Later in the quarter, Alex Highsmith blew past left tackle Donovan Smith to force a sack fumble, although it was recovered by Tampa Bay. Brady was even stuffed on a quarterback sneak, which has been an almost guaranteed one yard throughout his career. Once again, the Buccaneers couldn’t get much going on the ground, with a lot of it having to do with their offensive line failing to create holes. 

It also didn’t help that Mitch Trubisky decided to take out all of his pent-up anger against Tampa Bay’s defense. After subbing in for an injured Kenny Pickett, Trubisky seemed to release every throw like he had a point to prove. 

Trubisky finished the day completing 9/12 passes for 144 yards and a touchdown, including not one, not two, not three, but four conversions on 3rd and 10+ down the stretch. The Justin Herbert-ian performance was enough to propel the Steelers to a hard-fought 20-18 victory. 

With the loss, the Buccaneers are now 3-3, tied with the Falcons atop the NFC South, just as we all predicted at the beginning of the season. While the 2020-21 Super Bowl champion Buccaneers hit some rough patches before their bye week, this time around looks a bit more concerning. While Brady has been one to neutralize defensive lines because of how quick he gets the ball out of his hands, his offensive line can’t run block, and if Brady can’t find an open receiver quickly, the pass protection breaks down, too. Emotionally, Brady has yet to show many (if any) signs of happiness while wearing a Bucs uniform this season, and the negative vibes have translated onto the field and could easily continue if the Bucs can’t shore up the offensive line. 

“I love inside jokes. I’d love to be a part of one someday.” — Michael Scott

Packers fans wondering what has happened to their beloved football team 

Six drops. Nine quarterback hits. 179 rushing yards allowed. A major special teams error. All of Green Bay’s weaknesses from last season showed up again in a disheartening 27-10 loss to the Jets, who are slowly but surely establishing themselves as legitimate playoff contenders. Oop! I’ve now given myself a worthy excuse to show some Sauce Gardner highlights from Sunday:

Back to Green Bay: where to start? The Packers seem to improve their rushing defense every offseason, but for some reason, they get worse. Their defense looks incredible on paper, but the scheme Joe Barry has tried to implement has been like trying to force a circle into a square peg.

Despite having a myriad of solid cover corners, the Packers play a lot of zone, which has led to far too many miscommunications and big plays. Their pass rush is extremely predictable, as they mainly only send four or five rushers straight at the opposing offensive line. Stunts, twists and other diverse pass rush styles are minimal. If your offense is creative enough, moving the ball against the Packers becomes a lot easier. 

Offensively, the Packers simply aren’t good enough. Their offensive line is poor. Their receivers are knowingly ineffective, and Rodgers without Adams has proven to be something like Linus without his blanket. Even the absence of Marquez Valdes-Scantling has been noticeable, as he was Green Bay’s lone field stretcher that could, at the very least, open up other parts of the field for other receivers. The Packers literally can’t do anything fun or creative on offense because of the lack of talent on that side of the ball, and it’s been a large enough sample size to where that conclusion can be made with confidence. There are no threats on the outside. Davante Adams was so integral to this offense not just because of how good he was, but the attention he required from opposing defenses (especially considering how much he moved around pre-snap) came close to Calvin Johnson territory. Since that threat has completely disappeared, defending the Packers has become a lot easier. 

Apologies for sounding like a broken record, but Green Bay’s lack of heavy investment in the wide receiver position seems to finally be biting them in the tuchus. While they have an oddly incredible track record of making diamonds out of second-round receivers (Greg Jennings, Jordy Nelson, Randall Cobb, Davante Adams), what they have isn’t going to cut it. If the Packers don’t add a little spice to their game plan, it might be a struggle to make the playoffs. 

“Ain’t no party like a Scranton party cause a Scranton party don’t stop!” — Michael Scott

The Minnesota Vikings dancing the afternoon away

The Vikings might be the best team in the league at group celebrations. Over the past few seasons, they’ve had a Thanksgiving dinner, limbo competition, a game of Duck, Duck, Goose and a dance rhombus in the end zone. Those were all spectacularly coordinated celebrations that deserve kudos for their execution in such a short amount of time. 

On Sunday, Minnesota’s team celebration after a Patrick Peterson interception looked closer to a Fortnite lobby rather than a coordinated dance team. It was beautiful chaos that featured a myriad of moves from the purple and gold:

A quick debrief of everything that just happened:

• Patrick Peterson (#7) hit a griddy that looked closer to an Irish step dance, but I’ll count it
• Andrew Booth Jr. (#23) made a seamless transition from a griddy to what was either a Spiderman pose or a fake sniper shot 
• Troy Dye (#45) executed one of the most casually clean griddys (griddies?) I’ve ever seen 
• Brian Asamoah II (#33) gave CPR to Josh Metellus (#44), who was in the middle of making grass angels 
• Cameron Dantzler (#3) and Kris Boyd (#29) topped it all off with Jaylen Waddle’s signature “waddle” dance 

Football is a very easy sport to not have a lot of fun playing. It’s physically demanding, requires getting hit very hard and consumes an inordinate amount of time. However, the Vikings have reminded all of us that life is too short to get bogged down, especially when it’s easy to do so. Every once in a while, you just have to take a moment to soak in the good times and have a little fun, although Justin Jefferson might have to help refine some of his teammates’ dance moves.