Welcome back to another edition of Football Morning in Columbia, where KCOU’s Quentin Corpuel highlights the week’s best, worst and everything in-between from the NFL.
Front page headlines
Buffaloes rumbling
On Sunday, we saw a complete identity revamp from the Buffalo Bills.
Now, it’s not like they’ve completely neglected the run during the Josh Allen era – they’ve actually ranked pretty highly in rushing yards per game over the past few seasons. Rather, they haven’t been able to find an above-average running back to lean on for fruitful production. A lot of it came from Allen, but on Sunday, James Cook blossomed en route to a dominant Buffalo victory.
Again, it was the rushing attack that stole the show offensively. Their dropback rate was the lowest of Josh Allen’s career (29%), and their run rate over expectation was the highest in three seasons. For the first time in, uh, I honestly don’t know how long it’s been, Buffalo leaned on the run, and they gashed a quality opponent because of it.
This was the James Cook so many have wanted to see. He finished with 221 yards from scrimmage and two touchdowns. The fully realized version of Cook was to be a hybrid running back/receiver who could line up in a bunch of different places. It became reality on Sunday.
The Bills are currently 8-6; so are the Colts, Bengals, Jaguars and Texans. The job is far from finished, as they’ll need to close the season strong and get a little bit of help to make the playoffs. Should they get there, they could easily cement themselves as one of the best 6/7 seeds in playoff history if they continue playing like a complete team.
A potential solution to the MVP debate
At the moment, San Francisco 49ers quarterback Brock Purdy is the betting favorite to win MVP. The numbers certainly indicate as such; he currently leads the league in yards per pass attempt (9.9), passing touchdowns (29), touchdown-to-interception ratio (29-7), passer rating (119.0) and expected points added/play among qualified quarterbacks (0.32). He’s also second in passing yards (3,795) and completion percentage (69.8).
However, while the numbers say he’s a top-tier quarterback, the eyes don’t. A common argument for why a certain player should be the MVP is that, if you took them off of their respective team and replaced them with a league-average player, that team would be a lot worse. While Purdy has certainly played well, I certainly think someone like Jacoby Brissett could replace Purdy, and the 49ers would be just as good.
In fact, Purdy has indicated multiple times that everyone besides himself does the heavy lifting on offense. After their 45-29 victory over the Cardinals this past Sunday, he advocated for Christian McCaffrey to be MVP. Yes, that’s him being a good teammate, but it’s also the truth.
“I think Christian should be the MVP. I really do believe that. He does everything for us. Runs the ball well. Can catch the ball. He does everything, so in my eyes, that’s an MVP. I’m the guy that hands him the ball off and then turns back and watches what he does. Bounces off guys, making cuts, twisting off guys when he has all these guys holding onto him. I just see the beating that he takes and just his grit to continue to drive his legs and get extra yards and inches.”
Take note of the bolded sentence. This isn’t the first time he’s said something like this. Here’s a quote from last January about why Purdy thought the NFL (specifically being on the 49ers) was easier than college, and you’ll notice a similar sentiment being entailed:
“I’ve got so many playmakers around me, I feel like I don’t have all the weight of the world on my shoulders to make something up…Kyle {Shanahan} calls a great gameplan, I’ve just got to go through my progression, throw checkdowns to guys like Deebo {Samuel} and Christian {McCaffrey}, and they make guys miss…I’ve just got to distribute it to guys and they come up with all the yards and stuff.”
His MVP odds also stem from there not being a markedly better option. Dak Prescott just put up a stinker in Buffalo. Lamar Jackson’s been electric, but he’s far behind in counting stats. Patrick Mahomes hasn’t been the same. Jalen Hurts has registered a handful of poor performances, and so has Josh Allen. Tyreek Hill likely won’t achieve the necessary history that would render him a viable candidate. McCaffrey is certainly on pace to have a beyond amazing season, but he still has far lower odds than the top QB’s.
Besides, the 49ers aren’t just the best offense in the league. They aren’t just one of the best offenses in franchise history. They’re one of the best offenses of all-time. Through 14 weeks, only the 2007 Patriots and the 2010 Patriots are ahead of the 2023 49ers in offensive DVOA. While they may not be on pace to catch the 2013 Broncos in total points (606), they’re currently on pace for around 515, which would slot them 17th all-time.
Here’s one last thing about San Fran’s historic offense: they likely wouldn’t be here without the help of one another. Purdy likely wouldn’t sport the numbers he has without the help of the elite skill players, elite offensive line and elite play calling. On the other hand, McCaffrey, Deebo Samuel, Brandon Aiyuk and the other skill players likely don’t achieve the success they have if not for Purdy distributing the ball like a great point guard (with the help of Shanahan). Players helping each other out is the case with many NFL teams, but not at this level.
If we’re in the same place at the end of Week 18 as we are now, I have a proposal. It’s unorthodox, unprecedented in football and almost certainly won’t happen. However, I think this would rightfully encapsulate San Fran’s collective offensive dominance in a down year for individual superstardom.
Give the MVP to the entire San Francisco 49ers offense. Purdy, McCaffrey, Samuel, Kittle, Aiyuk, the entire offensive line. Everyone gets a share of the MVP.
There is precedent to this in sports (sort of). In the 2014-15 NBA season, the Atlanta Hawks won 60 regular season games and captured the top seed in the Eastern Conference. Just like the 49ers, the Hawks weren’t a conventional one-seed. Sure, four of Atlanta’s starting five made the All-Star team (Al Horford, Kyle Korver, Paul Millsap, Jeff Teague), but they didn’t have any true superstars. Heck, I think it would’ve been a stretch to call any of them stars. Rather, the Hawks were propelled by exceptional team basketball.
One of the highlights of their season was when they went 17-0 in the month of January, the first NBA team to ever go undefeated in a calendar month. At the end of each month, the NBA gives out a “Player of the Month” award. As the name implies, the award is almost always given to an individual player…except in January 2015. While no individual player stood out for the Hawks, Atlanta’s historic accomplishment left the NBA no choice to give them the award in some fashion, so they just gave the award to the entire starting five. It’d never been done before, and it hasn’t been done since. There’ve been plenty of co-champions co-award-winners throughout sports history, but there’d never been an individual award given to five players on the same team.
Maybe this is crazy. Maybe Kyle Shanahan should just win Coach of the Year, an individual player can win MVP, and normalcy can continue. Maybe I just find it odd that Purdy is breaking the mold of what an MVP candidate should look like. We’re so used to seeing MVPs playing like superhumans, blurring the line between mortality and myth; Purdy is just an average Joe QB who lives with a roommate and drives a Toyota Sequoia like the rest of us. Regardless, this is a mere out-of-the-box suggestion that I haven’t seen anyone talk about yet that I think would properly suit the potential circumstances a few weeks from now.
Quick(ish) hitters
Middling QB renaissance
Jake Browning, Derek Carr, Joe Flacco, Jared Goff, Case Keenum, Drew Lock, Baker Mayfield and Gardner Minshew all had stellar outings on Sunday. Like the dodgeball movie with Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson, Average Joe’s can sometimes be more than average!
Lamar Jackson
I will never take you for granted.
Arthur Smith
I will never understand you.
Darnell Mooney
Had a rather forgettable afternoon against the Browns. He whiffed on a block that would’ve given Chicago a crucial first down on fourth down in the fourth quarter, then dropped what would’ve been an all-time Hail Mary game-winner. It was right in his lap, and he literally kicked it away. The 2023 Chicago Bears in a play.
The Los Angeles Rams
Matthew Stafford & Co. look like a dangerous Wild Card matchup for a division winner.
Tee Higgins
Higgins might’ve had the play of the season on Saturday. Needing a touchdown to keep the game alive late in the fourth quarter, Jake Browning threw up a rainbow towards Higgins towards the front right pylon. Higgins jumped and essentially stole the ball from Akayleb Evans; however, Evans stuck with the play and began tackling Higgins just shy of the end zone…only for Higgins to do a 180 and extend his arm over the goal-line for a touchdown. It was giving Michael Jordan’s game-winning dunk in Space Jam. Truly otherworldly stuff!
Nick Mullens and the duality of falling over
Fall #1: Throw the ball directly into the facemask of the guy that just sacked you and have it fall right into his arms for an interception.
Fall #2: Somehow connect with Jordan Addison over the middle of the field for a touchdown. Funny world we live in!
Awards and superlatives
Sad Violins Award: The Los Angeles Chargers
Recently, I came across a song titled “Think of Me Once In a While, Take Care”. It’s less than two minutes long, so I encourage you to listen to it here:
The first ten seconds feature a violin slowly playing one note. It sounds like the violin is dying. Then, a second violin comes in and sounds like it’s trying to establish order over the first violin; the presence of the second violin makes it seem like the first one is broken. I actually have no idea if any more violins join, but it’s at least two the rest of the way. The sound the violins make is like something has completely fallen apart, like something is spiraling. The song has recently made the rounds on TikTok, and the general consensus is that the song spawns feelings of sadness and despair.
Amidst the Raiders doing literally whatever they wanted on Thursday night, the song popped into my head. I’d made a realization: that is the sound of the Chargers, both for this game and in general.
Let’s focus on the game. I’ve been a part of those kinds of blowouts myself. You feel like you’ve been hit by a meteor. In a way, you lose yourself, not like an “in-the-zone” Eminem-style lose yourself, but rather, you’re just kind of flesh and bones without an identity. Eyes that were once filled with anticipation become blank.
It was a blowout of historic proportions. The Raiders led 42-0 at halftime and had a lead as large as 56 in the second half. Last week, when the Raiders lost 3-0 to the Vikings, I listed a bunch of players that had been a part of 3-0 wins that all had funny names. This time, instead of listing names to put a stat into perspective, here’s a list of colleges:
Austin
Carnegie Mellon
Centre
Creighton
Dickinson
Georgetown
Lebanon Valley
Simpson
Swarthmore
Villanova
Those are some of the alma maters of the members of the 1927 Frankford Yellow Jackets who, before Thursday night, held the record for most first-half points scored the week after getting shut out. (Side note: Only Villanova has had NFL alumni post-World War II).
Another piece of history for ya: a team has scored 63+ points just 13 times in NFL history, and two of them have happened this season (Miami dropped 70 on Denver earlier this season). Before this season, the last team to score 63+ were the 1966 Washington Redskins, who hung 72 on the Giants. (Side note: their backup QB’s name was Dick Shiner. Maryland football legend, 11-year NFL veteran Dick Shiner.)
We’ve seen coaches get fired on the tarmac. We’ve seen coaches get fired right as they walked off the field after a loss. I thought we’d see a coach get fired in the middle of a game for the first time ever. The Chargers ended up doing the more sensical deed of firing Staley (along with GM Tom Telesco) the day after.
Now, the bigger picture. The Chargers have developed a reputation for losing in comical fashion. However, those usually included blown leads and baffling mistakes in close games. Embarrassing blowouts were rare. Yes, they’d lost 45-0 to the Patriots back in 2020. However, it wasn’t on a national stage, and jobs weren’t on the line. This was a monumental embarrassment that reached a level where seismic organizational changes could be delayed no longer.
With Justin Herbert out for the rest of the season, the rest of 2023 seems lost for the bolts. Looking ahead, the new head coach and GM, whoever they’ll be, will have a good and bad situation on their hands. On one hand, they’ll get to live in Southern California with Herbert as their QB. On the other hand, LA’s roster is old, filled with holes and their cap situation is one of the worst in the league.
Whatever ends up happening, we can say for sure that 2023 proved to be the turning point, and the game against the Raiders saw the violins play one of the saddest tunes in Chargers history.
Best Concluded Linsanity Run of 2023 (probably): Tommy DeVito
Sunday saw the likely death (or at least a postponement) of an unlikely hero. The Saints defense dominated the Giants en route to a 24-6 win. Tommy DeVito didn’t play poorly by any means, but he was sacked seven times and couldn’t create much for most of the game. It was almost a huge weekend for Italian-American New York athletes; the Rangers’ Vincent Trocheck scored two goals against the Bruins on Saturday, including the game-winner in overtime. But alas, the good times came to a screeching halt in NOLA.
Over the past few weeks, Giants fans enjoyed a neo-Linsanity. The storylines were awfully similar between DeVito and Jeremy Lin: both were undrafted backups whose ethnic background wasn’t well represented in their respective sports leagues that played shockingly well and uplifted a struggling professional New York sports franchise. Lin’s performances were a lot more frequent and better – he averaged All-Star numbers in February, outdueled Kobe Bryant on national television and hit a game-winner in Toronto. The Knicks, who were 9-15 pre-Linsanity, also ended up making the playoffs; the Giants, despite winning three straight after starting 2-8, currently have a 1% chance to make the playoffs according to the New York Times’ playoff simulator. Regardless, DeVito still captured the attention of the football world similarly to Lin, and I had a wonderful time embracing my non-existent Italian roots.
Britney Spears “Oops, I did it again” Award: Kadarius Toney
No, seriously. He did it again. Remember when his drop-turned-interception proved to be the difference in Kansas City’s Week 1 defeat to the Lions? Almost the exact same thing happened against the Patriots on Sunday. Luckily, it didn’t cost his team the game, as the Chiefs went on to win.
In a way, this play was Kadarius Toney in a nutshell. He springs open with a nifty herky-jerky route, only for the ball to go right through his hands and into the hands of a defender.
After Toney’s less-than-ideal game against the Bills, I asked ChatGPT to generate a Taylor Swift song about him. I figured that, at this rate, he’ll get flamed by Travis Kelce’s girlfriend in her next album, so I was curious to see what AI came up with.
Originally, ChatGPT told me that it was “against ethical guidelines to create content that spreads negativity or false information about individuals, including their professional abilities”. Fair enough. Instead, I asked it to write a Taylor Swift song about Toney, implying no negative feelings. Here’s what it came up with:
(Verse 1)
In the city lights, where the gridiron glows,
There’s a player shining, everybody knows,
Kadarius Toney, with moves so bold,
On the football field, he’s a story to be told.
(Pre-Chorus)
From the Gator swamp to the NFL stage,
Every step he takes, leaves a lasting page,
Speed and grace, in every stride,
A receiver so electric, he can’t hide.
(Chorus)
Oh, Kadarius, dancing through the yard,
In the end zone, where dreams aren’t marred,
Swift as the wind, catching dreams in flight,
In the game of football, he owns the night.
(Verse 2)
On the Giants’ turf, where legends are made,
Kadarius Toney, don’t need no serenade,
With hands like magic, and feet like fire,
He’s reaching heights that only inspire.
(Bridge)
Underneath the stadium lights,
He’s making moves, taking those flights,
Defenders stumble, trying to keep pace,
Kadarius dances, leaving a trace.
(Chorus)
Oh, Kadarius, dancing through the yard,
In the end zone, where dreams aren’t marred,
Swift as the wind, catching dreams in flight,
In the game of football, he owns the night.
(Verse 3)
From SEC clashes to NFL fame,
Kadarius Toney, a rising flame,
Defying gravity, breaking free,
On the field, he’s where he’s meant to be.
(Pre-Chorus)
From the college dreams to the pro-game show,
Kadarius keeps dancing, letting the doubters go,
A receiver’s anthem, a triumph’s song,
In the football symphony, he belongs.
(Chorus)
Oh, Kadarius, dancing through the yard,
In the end zone, where dreams aren’t marred,
Swift as the wind, catching dreams in flight,
In the game of football, he owns the night.
(Outro)
So here’s to Toney, the field’s maestro,
In every step, in every throw,
A melody of victory, a rhythm so right,
Kadarius Toney, in the football spotlight
I think there’d be a little more lyrical nuance in an actual Swift song about Toney (plus a splash of disdain), but for a computer, I was pretty impressed (other than the fact that it still thinks he’s on the Giants).
For as inaccurately positive as this song is, a few lines are unintentionally true. On the football field, Toney is certainly a story to be told. Every step he takes leaves a lasting page. He certainly hasn’t been able to hide from the attention he’s drawn with his untimely drops. While his hands may not be the kind of magical Chiefs fans would want, as a neutral observer, the kind of magic he’s producing is rather entertaining.
Play call of the week: Heisman!
It took until Week 15 for the Chiefs to pull off a wonky offensive formation, but it happened, and it was beautiful. Here’s the play, and here’s the awesome story behind it.
Quote of the Week
“PUT THAT F***ING SH** ON ME, MOTHERF***ER!” – Seattle Seahawks quarterback Drew Lock after leading a game-winning 92-yard touchdown drive against the Eagles on Monday Night Football.
Certain things, among others
At least we’re not Detroit!
On Monday, the Detroit Pistons lost their 24th straight game. They’re two games away from tying the NBA record for consecutive losses in a season; the honor is held by the 2010-11 Cleveland Cavaliers and the 2013-14 Philadelphia 76ers. Should the Pistons lose their next two games (Thursday against the Utah Jazz, Saturday against the Brooklyn Nets), the potential record-breaker would be next Tuesday at home against the Nets, the day after Christmas. They’re gonna need a holiday miracle to avert making the wrong kind of history.
Horns up, corns down
One sport I decided to follow a little bit more come tournament time was volleyball. The school that I currently attend (Mizzou) went from nine wins last season to the NCAA Tournament this season thanks to a new head coach (Dawn Sullivan) and a handful of newcomers. Them competing in the 64-team Big Dance piqued my curiosity, and I decided to watch some of the other games that happened throughout the tournament.
Long story short, volleyball rocks. It’s a bunch of tall and athletic human beings methodically smashing howitzers at each other for several hours – how does that not sound entertaining? There weren’t many upsets in this tournament – the biggest first round upset was an 11 over a 6 (TCU over Florida State), and the lowest seed to make the Sweet 16 was 5. But the quality of play (especially in the later rounds) was incredible. Rallies were frequent, kills seemed extra killer, and winning a set felt like winning two sets.
The Final Four featured three one-seeds (Nebraska, Pittsburgh, Wisconsin) and a two-seed (Texas) who was a one-seed in disguise. After starting 5-3, the Longhorns went 21-1 leading up to the Final Four. Against Tennessee in the Elite 8, they faced multiple match points in the fourth set, but they rallied to win that set as well as the game-winning fifth set.
They took on Wisconsin, who’d lost just three matches all season and hadn’t been taken to five sets in almost a month – and they kicked their butts, needing just four sets to do so. The final two weren’t particularly close – the Longhorns outscored the Badgers 50-29 in sets three and four.
In the final, they took on vaunted Nebraska, who possessed a similar aura to the Nebraska football teams of decades past. Despite not having a single senior on the roster, the ‘Huskers had one loss all season (a 3-0 sweep against fellow powerhouse Wisconsin), had been taken to five sets just three times and had outscored their previous five NCAAT opponents 15-1. They were the class of women’s collegiate volleyball, and they were expected to win.
So naturally, Texas not only beat Nebraska – they eviscerated them. After the Longhorns took a close first set, they outscored the tournament’s top seed 50-25 in the final two sets to win the title via clean sweep. Asjia O’Neal, the daughter of former NBA superstar Jermaine O’Neal, the top pick in the World Volleyball Federation Draft and survivor of two open heart surgeries, served 10 consecutive points on an 11-0 Texas run in the second set that proved to be the turning points. It was UT’s second consecutive title, capping off a season that saw them win 23 of their last 24 games and beat three one-seeds in the tournament (Stanford, Wisconsin, Nebraska).
This tournament saw major progress not just for a handful of programs (including Texas), but for the sport as a whole. The title game was the first to be televised on ABC, and it was played in front of a crowd of 19,727 people at Amalie Arena in Tampa, FL, the highest recorded attendance for a college volleyball match.
It’ll be a little while before the sport gets going again — the 2024-25 collegiate season doesn’t begin until August. When the time comes, I highly encourage you all to take in some of a sport that’s rightfully gaining national attention.